I'm hurting so much. I'm so torn between excitement and being scared. Why me? Why does Harry have to live his life without his twin brother by his side? Why must the chain be broken?
In this case, the only answer to this is, because he is too good for Earth, my little Christopher.
I feel so blessed having twins, it is so amazing because it is rare... I can't deal with the questions, and people automatically being thrilled at the fact I am a mummy of twins. Is it wrong for me to be jealous of the mums that can have both? Because it just seems so unfair to me that God is taking my little boy away. Yet I'm so excited that I have everything ready (ish) for Harry, he's my focus and I can't let him down, because he's losing his brother- he can't lose me, too.
I just wonder how I will be.
And I'm terrified.
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